First Love - Inspired by BTS' Suga's First Love

Hi guys.. This post will be a little depressing so trigger warning here.Have you ever been in love? Ever lost someone you care about so much that you would die internally without them? I have, sort of...I had this one person in my life who now continuously haunts me on a daily basis, the mere thought of them brings me to tears. I lost them a while ago and have been loosing my sanity day by day without them. They were my everything and more, every hope I have ever had in human form. And then they were taken away from me. Lost to the reaper themselves, I spent thirteen years of my life with them and one night was all it took for them to disappear off the face of this earth. No matter how many time I tell myself it will be okay it never is. I have dreams about them, remember that faithful night and yell at myself why were you not there to stop them? It's all your fault I yell at myself, Imagine waking up everyday knowing that the sun might be shining outside but on the inside it's pouring rain,Nowadays I walk among my school corridors smiling and laughing with my friends. Pretending that I am really bubbly and happy but really, it's all fake, I am struggling to find a reason to live, I never used to struggle to understand how someone can pour their whole entire life into someone but now I struggle so deeply to understand it. I hope you guys don't have to deal with these kinds of emotions, I know what it feels like and I am sorry if you have lost someone you love. I hope someday we can all understand the true meaning of love again and I pray for you all, and I promise that we will all get through this together

Signing off for now,

Luissa xxx